Someday

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Someday, a man is going to walk into my life and he will be all things that the one before was and better.

This man will show me things are not as bad as I dread and expect them to be like,

this man, will wipe away all the pain, loss and fear that the one before left behind.

He will make me understand why so many things had to go wrong

So that I would be worthy of the good that came later.

He will be everything I dreamed of and more.

Someday, this is going to happen,

Or so I have to believe.

But that day

is not

Today.

I was inspired by the Queen Song, "Somebody To Love"

Each morning I get up I die a little

Can barely stand on my feet

Take a look in the mirror and cry

Lord what you're doing to me

I have spent all my years in believing you

Lord!

Somebody, somebody

Can anybody find me somebody to love?

Here and Now.

She has been broken before. She was always a little broken inside. 

And she always found new ways to keep herself that way. 

She never trusted anyone,but still got hurt. 

But these days, the only person she does not trust,is herself.

And only because she has let herself trust someone completely.

It is strange,even insane. 

She had found tranquility in her distrust. 

It does not matter anymore. 

Getting hurt is second nature to her. 

The only thing that matters is that she has someone in her life,

who she expects to come back to her .

They may not get forever, 

but nobody gets forever. 

She has found you,

here and now. 

Someone she has been looking for her whole life. 

You have given her something no one else could. 

Faith. 

Faith that there is someone like you out there for someone like her. 

Faith that even if she doesn't get forever with you, 

she gets this much with you. 

She has been through enough to know that forever, 

is for fools. 

Here and now.

Is what matters.

Choices Choices

This is such a cliche of a title,

But its too apt to be anything but..

I am too young to talk of anecdotes from my life,but with the experience I've had, I just realized that the human nature is to crave for things that is out of your hand. When you have a person in your life who you want with all your might,you think that all of the problems in your life will simply be solved by making that person realize just what they mean to you.But then,you get what you've always wanted.He loves you back..but by then,its too late.You have spend so much time finding little faults to that person who doesn't want you,that you slowly start to see all those things you thought were just excuses to make you feel better,you start to realize that all those reasons you listed out on why things couldn't workout between you two are in fact true, and your crazy dreams about how much better life could be better without them in your life,actually seems possible.
You have moved on,or you have moved onto dreaming about bigger and better things.You have realized that  you need to capable of being your own person,that you need to fall in love with yourself first..As soon as you start to realize your own self worth, he starts wanting you back too,but by then its too late and you have to make the choice of whether to stay with this person you "thought" was your world,or you have to let go and choose better things,you have to choose to make a world of your own.

And while writing all these things, I just realized what I need to do,since I am in this decision.

and here comes another cliche cliche..

I choose me... 

:)